Mount.Kilimanjaro is booked and confirmed!

Hello everyone

It's finally sorted and booked! I cannot even begin to put into words the excitement, the relief even that it's finally going to happen. Each and every time it had to be delayed for whatever reason it chipped away at my confidence that it would ever happen. I've waited a long time to get to this point and know no matter how hard it is, I am going to savour every single second of it!

2014 has just like every year since diagnosis been a completely mixed bag on every front. Some health issues have been diagnosed and finally sorted, others are still been investigated and the discomfort and uncertainty remain.

This year saw me having two individual cancer scares which I've mentioned in previous posts. The great news is that the scares turned out to be just that- scares, but it does still play with your mind a little. With the second one this July gone, I found myself re-evaluating my life, my plans once more.....with all the messing about I'd endured over the build of my boat,and to find out I'd been lied to yet again over the start date of the build - I was so angry, that I've cancelled the project all together.

Friends & family were curious as to why, and with reason, it's been my plan for over 12 months....but the fact is I had been sent off for tests for another lump found in my breast ( same one I had cancer in ) and I thought exactly the same as the first time, it is what it is, let's see what we are dealing with, if anything....but while I went for the tests I thought about the boat and my frustration with it, if I had cancer again, who would the boat be left to, who would have the hassle of dealing with it, was it the best plan to tie up all my cash in the boat and have nothing to actually live my life....especially after the previous few years where I literally had nothing and was struggling to survive. It's not like I have children to think of, and no matter what happens - I want to live my life to the fullest......I'm done with the struggling, as far as I'm concerned it's time to let loose and enjoy, it's taken enough years to get my health back on track to do so.

And sadly again another reminder of our own mortality - Linda Bellingham bless her lost her battle with cancer yesterday (Monday ) actually my birthday and it does reset my mind a little. All through my own personal journey with the cancer, I have never broken down and cried, I've never actually felt sad about it, it is what it it and the only thing I could ever control was how I was going to deal with my treatments....and me being me I did so with interest and humour. And the only time I've thought about my own mortality was when a dear friend passed away after losing his battle with cancer after it came back after 15 years in remission. I suddenly thought, it really can just appear back in your body at any time, just like that. I read the message from a mutual friend who had informed me of Tommy's passing and I just cried and cried, not in fear of myself but for the loss of one of the kindest and most gentle of men I had ever had the pleasure to know.

So when things like this are happening around you all the time and even though you are clear of cancer right now and god willing will stay that way - it makes you look at everything in the greatest of detail. I live my life to the fullest I can every day, I try to fill it with fun and laughter, and try to make others lives fun too. The only impression I want to leave others with of myself are positive ones where they think I'm glad I met/chatted with Tracy....if only for a few minutes. And I 'll know it was the real me they got.

It's made me try to be braver on the personal front, no-one ever believes me but I am actually a shy, I've never understood or got flirting, I don't even realise if someone is flirting with me, unless it's has subtle as a sledge hammer! but with everything that's happened in my life in recent years, I want to be able to laugh and chat with girls and see where it takes me, it's the scariest thing in the world, I don't know how to go about it all really. I just know I want to be brave enough to say I like you to someone who catches my eye....I know more than most life is fleeting and needs grabbing with both hands. The positive from all this scary stuff is that I've healed enough in myself to be even thinking this....so we'll see if anything ever comes of it!! I miss touching, holding hands, cuddles and hugs....I miss all that the most.

For the longest time I didn't believe I deserved another chance at happiness, that I didn't have anything to offer anyone in a relationship, that after the surgery and all the cascade of illnesses etc it made me somehow not whole, inferior or damaged goods if you want....and who in their right mind would want to deal with all that? it's been the toughest part of my whole cancer journey to get to the point where I think, maybe there's someone out there that won't find it a massive chore, that thinks maybe I am worth it. Well like I say I'm trying to be brave and that's all I can do...right?

I'm back with my consultant on the 23rd Oct for the results from my recent Colonoscopy, here's hoping for some answers to the pain in my left side....if not it's onto the next investigative procedure....all I can say is after 2 years I'd just like a bit of a breather from the discomfort. So we'll see what happens on results day!I will of course keep you informed of the results and the follow up if any.

Until next time

Tracy

Flights booked Mount.Kilimanjaro Feb 2015!

Hello everyone

It's finally after all this time becoming reality! yes folks the flights to Tanzania are finally booked - wow such a long time since I set the challenge in 2010 but finally after many set backs is going to happen. So Becky, Ali and myself will fly out from Manchester on Jan 30th to JRO - Kilimanjaro's international airport and won't return to the UK until Feb 17th!

We haven't booked our actual climb yet but have been checking various companies out, emailing them etc. We are going to narrow it down to about half a dozen and then make a decision within the next couple of months.We are still going to be doing the Lemosho route and hopefully we'll be able to bag a bargain for a safari with the same company!

So we've been getting our gear together and I think we've all nearly finished. I've still some stuff to get, but will leave it until nearer the time for now. Bec's has had her first jabs and I'm booked in with the nurse for mid September to start mine. Will let you know which jabs I have to have when I find out. I've had to start a long way out with my jabs as they can only be administered into my left arm.....so unlike many years ago when I went to India and left it until the last minute and had to have both arms and my butt done in one day....I'm been organised and getting it done in a timely fashion.

Bec's GP surgery have told her the Rabies jabs isn't needed and so I will keep my fingers crossed mine say the same but will go with their recommendations of course.

So I've decided to hit my bike in order to get some stamina and endurance training in, on top of my daily mileage with my business....and then of course it's plenty of hill walking on top of that. So hoping for no knock backs as I crack on with my training for my once in a lifetime Mt.Kili climb!

Now looking at things to see and do while in the area, we'll see what we can do/afford or even have the energy for after our climb!!

So my current health is:-  I'm fully recovered from having my gallbladder out, still getting sharp pains on and off, no idea if that is normal or not. Although I wasn't told or given any dietary restrictions/information I have discovered myself that I'm doing badly with dairy. Can't stomach a yoghurt without been violently sick and I have very little tolerance for milk....but that's been like that for a long time now, in fact since my chemo days.

I've not been called back to the hospital and breast clinic as of yet and I guess I should contact them to find out what the hell is happening. I did finally get a letter telling me my mammogram looked fine, nothing about the ultrasound I had to have to check out the lump that was discovered at my last clinic appointment ( luckily for me the radiologist told me it wasn't anything to worry about ). But I still haven't been officially given the 5 year clear or released from the hospital, I have no idea what is going to happen from here on in and quite frankly I am not impressed with the after care I received from the hospital in general.

My invasive treatments and the care I was given through that was second to none and I still as you know go see my old chemo nurses fairly regular. But since then it has been nothing short of a shambles with my 6 monthly check ups and a new doctor every time I've gone. I will be good and get hold of my breast specialist nurse to find out if I'm done with them or not. In January the doctor had said it was in no way definite that I would be released and sent on my merry way this July just gone....but after my second scare of the year I've no clue!

As for the pain in my left, I have the first of my exploratory procedures to try get to the bottom of my 2 year pain. I'm scheduled for a Colonoscopy on Oct 3rd, so we will see where this now leads.....me?....I hope it leads to a pain free period of time!

My consultant has said if nothing shows up from this procedure it will be followed up with a CT scan and again if nothing, then a MRI. Where the medical staff in Leeds believe it's bowel issues, my consultant doesn't think so, he thinks my spine......so I said well why not go straight for the MRI, surely it will show everything up and save money. He however wants to do it this way round!

I just want answers and fingers crossed a solution, it would be swell to be able to crack on with life without something lurking in the background for a bit.

Until next time

Tracy   

Mount.Kilimanjaro to go ahead Feb 2015!

Hello everyone

We have three definite climbers for Mount.Kilimanjaro this coming February! It's hard to put into words what this adventure means to me, I know I have written about how I came to challenge myself with this amazing climb previously but emotionally it feels like it means I'm back. If I can climb to the Roof of Africa......then I'm fully back and I think I'll find peace with the frustrations of all the other health issues I've had/got since my diagnosis. I know this won't make any sense to you guys, but it does to me.

 I am so very lucky to have friends like I do....Bec's and Ali are real troupers and no matter what I ask of them, their answer is always yes. We have already committed ourselves to next years Walk the Walk Edinburgh Moonwalk in June for breast cancer as long as we can get places ( keep your fingers crossed for us ).

We are all busy getting our kit together for our Once in a lifetime climb, this is a full on commitment because the kit is expensive enough without even adding the cost of the actual climb and flights! We are planning to do the Lemosho route because it has a higher success rate for summit ascent and gives you more time to acclimatise and hopefully fingers crossed will help prevent any major issues with altitude sickness.

So we are checking out flights and prices now as well as local climb companies,,,,,we have all agreed to try keep the money local if possible. Just waiting for renewed passport to come back and then we are on it. So in all probability flights will be booked in the next 3 weeks!! it feels so real now after waiting what seems a lifetime. Thank you Suzie for countersigning my passport and for telling them in her words "Jelly isn't a terrorist" lol!! 

On the Lemosho route our start point will be the Londorossi gate, the point of no return....this moment I cannot wait for!

We know it's going to be a tough grind at times and now I'm recovered from the gallbladder removal, I'm hoping to crack on with some great training sessions.....I want to be on an even playing field with the girls, so my tough is as close as par to theirs as I can get......then I'll be happy! On route we will see the Lava tower and my plan if I can is to climb to the top of it.....I will be bringing a small piece of it home with me ( shhhhhsh it's a little secret! ) I hope I get a chance to climb it and more importantly.....I hope I can get to the top!

I literally shake with excitement and anticipation of standing at the summit of Uhuru at 5895m - the World's tallest free standing mountain.....what else is there to say!

I really want my photo taking here!!!

Here's a couple of ariel shots of Mount.Kilimanjaro to finish this off.....

On the health front, I'm still waiting for my first appointment to kick off the investigations to try find out the cause of my 2 year pain/discomfort in my left side.....I will keep you up to date as things progress.

Until next time

Tracy

Consult for pain in left side flank

Hello Everyone

Hope you are all enjoying the weather, and those of you in the UK - hope you're making the most of it!

An update after my consultation about the left side flank pain I've had for a couple of years.So we know I've had my gallbladder removed 5 weeks ago and hopefully that will put an end to the right flank and central pains I've had...so as I was told be the medical staff at the hospital I went back to my GP for a referral for this pain in my left side after they told me it definitely wasn't connected to the gallbladder issue. ( they think bowel issues )

I had my consult this past Thursday and it was actually with the consultant I'd seen about the same issues ( including the then undiagnosed gallbladder ) back in Jan 2013. Where I'd had a CT scan and ultrasound which had picked up nothing.....so was signed off with a "you'll have to just get on with it" kind of thing.

So the conversation starts with a So we meet again Tracy and my response of  yes, it would seem so - ha! I told him about the discovery of the large mobile gallstones and subsequent surgery ( he did look a little meek when I told him this.....big fail on his part there ) and then about the continued left side pain which is now a constant. It ranges from knowing it's there to dull or up to pretty acute, the continued bloating and all the other symptoms that go with it.

I told him honestly I am utterly stalled with it and after all this time would like to know what it is and would like it fixed if at all possible. We chatted about my 2 cancer scares this year and the other health issues that have marred yet another year.

He's decided a course of action which will start with a Colonoscopy. He's said it is unpleasant to which I said it's a means to an end for me....it cannot possibly be any worse than everything that's happened in recent years to which he agreed. He is in disagreement with the medical staff of ST.James and doesn't think it is bowel related, he said my symptoms aren't usual with bowel problems....but is going to start the investigation here.

He said if as he suspects the Colonoscopy comes back clear I will then have another CT scan to see if it shows anything up and if not then it will be a MRI scan....he said my symptoms could actually be from my back or specifically my spine. I guess time will tell. He said they have a duty of care to get to the bottom of it and will do whatever they can to reach a diagnosis......me? I say about bloody time! sheesh, it's been going on years!


I've told everyone I'm disregarding my 40's - they have been the pits so far, so much for life beginning eh lol!!

So anyway - it's been a long, painful at times journey to this point where they are seriously going to investigate, but at least it's now here and happening - onwards and upwards!

So back to some exciting news - Mount.Kilimanjaro is going to happen the beginning of February 2015!! - what a long complicated and frustrating journey this has been! Bec's, Ali and myself ( the three WoC muskateers ) are definite's for this....we have booked our time off work and are now looking into flight and climb prices.....this is no cheap challenge and is going to set us back in the region of £2000 each just for flights and the climb.....the hotel and any other excursions we do while there will be on top....so definitely a once in a lifetime thing!! Anyone else need to decide if this is something they still are interested and confirm their desire to join us on an epic adventure! We don't have time to be chasing around after everyone - you want to do this challenge....then contact me and commit!

So at today's exchange rate £2000 would be
$3330 US dollars - AUD 3520 - EUR 2480!

So a challenge that sees a major commitment to and a real desire to conquer the World's tallest free standing mountain at 19,340ft at that cost. Be we are all excited about this challenge and know it's going to be tough....but worth every single step up to the summit.

I want to thank Bec's and Ali here on the blog for not only wanting to come climb Mount.Kilimanjaro with me......but for always saying yes to any challenge I ask them about. Their continued support of my challenges and myself is something I'm eternally grateful for and love them both very much for. So a massive thank you as always girls!!

So on that happy note, I wish you all a great weekend.

Until next time

Tracy

And the Oscar for another year of health dramas goes to.......

Hello everyone

If it wasn't for the fact I have/had illnesses I'd believe I was suffering from Munchausen syndrome  - boy you couldn't script everything that's gone on with me in the last too many years!

I've been very quiet here on my blog this year, a couple of reasons for this.....the first is my lack of drive in organising charity events after a very disappointing year last year what with the Zumba etc . Although conquering Ben Nevis was a personal high! I still puff my chest up with pride knowing I conquered the highest point in the UK and overall was happy with my time especially with all the issues I had with cramps in my right calf and both quads ( I tell you trying to slide uphill on packed down slippy snow was a challenge all on it's own! )

The second and still ongoing is problems I've been having again this year with my own health ( it feels like a never ending battle some days ). It's not been the best of times and I have tried very hard to stay upbeat about it, and the majority of time I succeed....there are however days when even I the ever optimist fail!

I also think earlier this year I came the closest ever to a breakdown, I was so very stressed with so many things and I really struggled to get through it on my own - but somehow I did, still not sure how, one thing I learned is alcohol and Facebook really don't mix when you are at a personal low - I let loose a bit more than I would have wanted too, but I can't change that fact and actually feel sorry for those friends on there that actually witnessed it.....only positive? it would have been worse in person.

The causes of the near breakdown? major stress of serious financial worries, the house not selling and coming to the realization I couldn't afford to live in it or to move out. I was totally trapped in this nightmare cycle of depending on my sister to bail me out, my mum and sister helping to buy food for me.....house viewing after house viewing not reaping anything. Trying to sort out some house maintenance that hadn't been done since I'd been diagnosed with the cancer and consequent treatments and major health issues I'd suffered with the cancer prevention drugs. Knowing I was on my own after the break up of my relationship of 14 years, no-one to help take the burden ( there again better to be on your own than with someone who disrespects you for years as it turned out ), trying always to down play my anxiety and stress levels to everyone because they all know I'm not supposed to get stressed because of the cancer. Not been able to find a job because no-one was willing to give me a chance even though I was applying for jobs well within my skill base because of my health history....they were scared I'd take lots of time off work, and even maybe be diagnosed with the cancer again....it was dark times indeed for me - my self esteem and self confidence was kicked and battered around the job market day after day. So I finally took control of that aspect of my life and started my own business, this was a real turning point because I stopped the depressing cycle of rejection.

One of the biggest kicks in the teeth was the buyer who pulled out one hour before contracts were to be exchanged - this was after four months of pandering to her every whim in order to get rid of the house. It was the straw that broke the camels back as it were and nearly completely pushed me over the edge. It got messy because I couldn't cope with the knowledge the house selling process had to start over again, and it dropped me into total despair wondering how I was to survive until it finally sold.

I think I averaged about three hours of sleep a night and that was broken sleep. Tough times indeed.

In amongst the anxiety and stress of the house and the financial worries my health was once again causing me problems - no matter how hard I try to get on an even keel something happens that causes me to slip backwards. Not that this stops me from getting up again to push forward once more....but it is tiring to keep doing so. The aspect I have always found the most difficult is not being able to exercise or train properly or at all. Anyone who knows me understands how much I crave the outdoors, I love been out and about, and really enjoy pushing myself to better my time,score or whatever measurement I've set myself. I thrive on setting myself really tough challenges, it's what drives me when I'm not feeling my best, so for an illness to make that impossible I find the toughest to cope with.

The end of October 2013 saw me get what I at first thought was a stitch after completing a training session with my cousin Paul - he was putting me through my paces with my cage fight training ( no I'm not planning on competing, but the training is bloody great! ) and as I finished my session I got a stitch we laughed about it and said luckily I'd finished and not just started. I had a glass of water but the pain hadn't gone when I'd finished it.....so I figured it was a slight muscle strain. I text Paul the next morning cancelling my session for the day saying I'd take the weekend off to recover and would see him Monday.

Around 2 am on the Sunday morning I was woken up with the most awful explosion of pain in my right side, it took my breath away and I struggled to turn off my right side to my back. I did it eventually and after a tremendous effort managed to get myself over to the edge of the bed and into a sitting position - I was panting very shallow breaths and the pain had not eased at all, this had taken me about 45 minutes to get sat up. I spent the rest of the early hours of the morning shuffling around upstairs and the pain finally eased enough to allow me to sit down around 7 am.

I was in lots of discomfort all day Sunday and didn't even manage to go downstairs to make a cup of tea - well that says it all - me, the constant tea drinker! My sister Debbie rang me in the afternoon and knew straight away something was wrong, I refused to let her take me to A&E and said if it hadn't eased off the following day I'd phone the doctor. I did phone the doctor the next day and so started the investigations into my flank pain for the second time in 2013 when I finally saw them.

November see's a new problem rear its head for me, I experienced some spotting and vaginal bleeding, this in itself was a shock seen as I had been kicked into a premature menopause in the Aug of 2009 by the CMF chemotherapy. I took it as a one off but when just over 10 days later I experienced yet another episode I made an appointment to see my GP. The surgery made a referral for an internal ultrasound to check what was going on as well as scans for my left and right flank pains ( which have been ongoing for 2 years now ). So it was a case of coping with the pains in my flanks and recording any further bleeding and for how long it went on for.

I had my scan date which was Dec 23rd - this showed that I had in fact got gallstones ( runs in the family ) and a thickening in the uterus wall ( the opposite of what normally happens when you are post menopausal apparently ) . The scan didn't show anything up regarding the left flank pain. I couldn't get back to see my GP and where we went from there until Jan of this year.

So 2 referrals were made, the gallbladder and the uterus wall thickening. I saw the consultant about my bleeding/uterus issue in the Feb and he decided to do a hysteoroscopy under general anaesthetic to see what was going on. By this time I had had 8 separate bleeding episodes. I was scheduled for this procedure as a day case at the end of Feb. The good news from the hyseoroscopy was it showed no signs of cancer and the bleeding was put down to an infection. I'm happy to report I've had no bleeding since the procedure. He also said the thickening in the wall of my uterus was nothing to be concerned about as everything looked fine.

I finally got a consultation about my gallstone problem ( this had been playing me up badly since October ) early April, so as soon as I sat down I was told they would be definitely removing my gallbladder but there was a problem. I asked what that was, only to be told my ultrasound scan from Dec had been lost ( how do you lose an electronic scan???? ) - I said you mean someone has deleted it off the system?! He said he needed to have another done before I could be scheduled for surgery and he would make me another clinic appointment for 6 weeks time, and for me to make sure I'd had the scan done before that - I felt like ripping my hair out,I've not been able to train or exercise since October and I'm climbing the walls! I asked if the pain in my left was caused by the gallstones/gallbladder to which he said no way. This was the exact opposite of what I wanted to hear. I said if you know you're taking it out, do it without the scan, he said he couldn't he needed to see my bile duct.....I said have a look while you're in there! he started laughing and said I can't. I tried my best to get him to just do it, he wouldn't saying he really needed to see if there was any damage to my bile duct and to also check my liver because of my history of cancer. So my cajoling failed but I can say I gave it my best!

He asked me why a consultant I'd been under in the Jan '13 had signed me off without getting to the bottom of all the pains I'd been presenting for so long ( left, center and right side ) I told him he'd have to phone and ask  him because I didn't know......I told him I'd basically been told to get on and live with it, he wasn't impressed at all ( that makes the two of us! ) He asked me if I'd had the camera up my bum - to which I said no I haven't with some indignation ha ha!, he told me I must without fail get back to my GP for a referral....he was convinced the pain is been caused by bowel issues ( something else to add to the never ending list of issues )

So feeling very put out I left with another 6 week delay because some numpty had accidently deleted my Dec scan results - I really felt it would never end. It was a long wait but I finally had the scan redone to which the radiologist told me they were big and mobile ( oh I know love from the discomfort I've been suffering for months ). She showed me one of the stones, it was at the top of my gallbladder and was mobile - it was the size of a grape...so yes, pretty big, she said my gallbladder was full of them. She also scanned down my left flank and to be honest it was even sorer than my gallbladder and when she was pressing down it was taking my breath away. She told me my kidney looked fine but as she carried on scanning my side she said again it was looking like classic bowel issues ( whatever that is ). An ultrasound cannot see anything in your bowel because it's too dense.

So I was back into clinic to be told the surgery would be 6-8 weeks away, I groaned and moaned saying I'd already had to endure a 6 week delay due to someone's mistake over my original scan, I was however sent up to the pre op ward to at least get all that out of the way only to be told they couldn't do it and I would have to return in 2 weeks time. So off I tootles home. The following day they phoned me saying I needed to have me pre op much sooner than my appointed time, I asked when, they said Friday of that week - so back I goes on Friday.

I was taken in for day surgery on June 20th ( 4 weeks after last consult ) for keyhole gallbladder removal. How far has medicine come when you go into hospital first thing in the morning and come home the afternoon of the same day minus an organ!! amazing stuff really. I was told 2 weeks of absolutely nothing and thereafter a slow build up to normal activities. In reality I did nothing for 4 days ( hey I'm self employed and 2 weeks was never a possibility ) then was back at work with lots of help for the first week and then back out on my own thereafter.....I've been a little slower than normal and I know I've had something done.....but must say I'm very happy with my progress.

I'm not 100% and I'm having various problems which I'm not sure if they are part of the recovery process or something that needs addressing, I will get onto it soon. I've on and off been violently sick and am suffering with diarrhea after food consumption every time. I have a pain in my back/side more often than not and what feels like an air bubble in the general vicinity of where the gallbladder was. Anyway if it doesn't settle soon I'll go back to see my GP - I have been once about it, around 2 weeks after my surgery....she didn't seem overly concerned at the time. Time will tell.

I have just got my referral through to start the process off with the left flank pain which I hopefully will find out what has been causing it for the last 2 years and more importantly that they will be able to treat and get rid of. I'm optimistic an end could be in sight for this!

And to my last medical drama of the year so far! On July 3rd I went to the breast clinic for my 6 monthly check and also my annual mammogram. This day marked my 5 year clear of cancer and I was hoping for my release from the hospital. ( I know people who were discharged at 3 years ) Now it's all very confusing for me because when I was there for my check up in Jan, they told me it was no way near a definite that I would be given the all clear and sent on my way in July and there were many variables to be taken into account,  when I questioned this, all they said was it was to be discussed and I would find out in due course. I still don't understand the reasoning or why he was so cryptic about it.

  The doctor was giving me my physical and as I pulled away in pain ( I have acute pain in the area around where they did the sentinal lympth node biopsy ) he said to me I've felt a lump, have you felt a lump? my answer was no. I was told I'd be having my mammogram as normal but would require an ultrasound to check out the lump, unfortunately it couldn't be that day because of how busy they were ( clinic day has normally around 3/4 different clinics going at the same time ) and I'd get a call arranging for me to come in. I had my mammogram and left the hospital for the day.

I got a call the following Tuesday to go for my ultrasound on the Thursday ( last week ), I went and had the ultrasound done and can confirm there is a mass or lump there but it isn't a recurrence of my breast cancer. ( unofficially told by radiologist ) The mass or thickened breast tissue is most likely scarring from the radiation therapy. I will  be called back to the hospital for them to officially tell me the ultrasound was clear and I'm hoping that they will then discharge me......guess I'll have to wait and see on that front.


But regardless of whether the hospital discharge me or not, the fact is I've made 5 years clear of cancer and for that I'm celebrating my life!

 It has been at times a real tough and frustrating slog - especially when I on the cancer prevention drugs, I suffered so badly with the side effects for 2 whole years with greatly reduced mobility and a poor quality of life, for goodness sakes I could hardly get out of bed on my own and dress myself. So the decision that took me a year to make - to stop the prevention drugs 3 years early was the right one for me. And even through some quite heated discussions with the medical profession who tried to get me back on them, I stood my ground. I told them I understand the risks I've put myself under but feel totally vindicated at the fact I' m now living my life and not been forced to watch it pass on by.

I climbed Ben Nevis last year - the highest point in the United Kingdom and regardless of my current health issues, my plan is to climb Mount.Kilimanjaro next year.

I will always endeavour to set and complete challenges, to live my life to the utmost everyday and try to get through the dodgy ones with humility and humour. I motivate myself by keeping myself positive. YOLO has in some instances been taken and made a negative by individuals who will use it for an excuse for bad or poor behaviour, a reason to not accept responsibility for themselves.

Well I claim it back for everyone who battles and fights on a daily basis because some of us are lucky enough to fully understand the You Only Live Once outlook on life - I embrace my day and thank my lucky stars I've got another one. The saying stop and smell the roses - try it someday, you'll be amazed how enriched your day and life will be. 

I'm positively looking forward to my health issues getting sorted this year and hoping for nothing more than onwards and upwards in my future. I will continue to try my hardest to make this happen.

Until next time

Tracy 

Happy New Year everyone

Hello and Happy New Year to you all

The first post of the year is to let you know that the first part of the year for definite will be very quiet from a WoC point of view.I have decided that we will not be planning and organising any events for a while and that WoC will be taking a step back for the time been.We had a very busy year from a planning and background point of view last year. Has anyone who follows the blog knows - an immense amount of time & effort were put into the first six months of the year planning and organising the Zumba and consequent World record attempt only for a forced delay to occur. We didn't have a great year regardless of great effort put in. It was a very stressful and disappointing time for WoC's ambassadors and myself.

I am going to concentrate over the next few months on getting myself right and back to sustained health and good level of fitness. I was diagnosed with Gallstones on Dec 23rd whilst having some scans. There is also some other investigations going on and I will be sure to inform you if anything comes of them. I decided to put Woc on the back burner for now, because every time I start to get going with my fitness, something happens and I get knocked back. So I want to stop this continuous one step forward, two steps back and finally put it to bed once and for all has they say. I have some great challenges this year and will not be able to succeed if I don't get it right.  

I think one of the problems is how every busy it was last year from a general health point of view. I have been run down and have had recurrences of various infections over the last few months or so. On top of working full time I was doing two part time college courses and many hours were spent on WoC planning events such as the Zumba.

So because I have some big endurance events coming up this year, I have decided to get myself sorted out and that means not spending time on WoC. I will be posting how well my training is going when I actually can get started with it ( hopefully I will be seeing the consultant shortly for the Gallstone issue ). I as soon as possible need to get training, it will be a heavy schedule which is another reason for WoC going on the back burner. I am really conscious of not overloading myself again this year.

Details of the challenges I have already got on this year can be found on the blog. So many wonderful things are either planned or in the process of happening this year. The house sale is due to be completed end of March. So I will be busy sorting out my new living arrangements. My new business venture will be ready for full launch around the beginning of April.

I will get back into blogging on a regular basis - and this one is scary....I will be practicing video blogging ( yikes! ).....I really don't like being in front of the camera, am much happier behind it for sure!. But I want to do a video blog diary when I climb Mt. Kilimanjaro in September. I doubt I'll feel upto writing a blog daily while climbing, and I know for sure I won't remember everything to write at a later date. I'd like if the team are willing to get a little from them daily too.....to see what their perspective is of the days events. So I need to practice filming on my camera....trying to get used to it so it doesn't sound/seem to bad when it comes to the real thing on the mountain.

Until next time
Tracy

Old year coming to an end - bright new 2014 to look forward to!

Hello everyone

As I look out of my window and see a grey start to the day up here in Yorkshire, I think to myself, well that's the only thing that's grey around here. Today I'm going to be signing on for hopefully the last time because I have an appointment with my business mentor this coming Thursday and that should hopefully point me in the right direction for funding and a possible grant while starting up my new business.

I will be out posting contact details for Paws to Pavement today and all this week in the areas I will be covering. I am very confident about this venture and really looking forward to it. A really happy and positive way to end what has been a  frustrating  and very tiring 2013. I am more than happy to see it pass into the past!

I'm off to have a cuppa with my wonderfully fun and courageous friend Katie Noonookes Stirk who is not having the easiest of times right now, but is coping really well with her current health situation with great grace and humour. Katie was one of the best things to come from my job earlier this year, a genuinely true friend and a brilliant ambassador for War on Cancer....it proves that great friendship is not borne from the length of time you've known someone. I love this lass to bits and wish her the speediest of recoveries and the best of health and happiness for the future.

2014 - Looking forward I feel this will finally be my year - I have waited a long time for this! Having had problems with a severe physical injury ( crutches for 5 months ), previous employers and my own serious health issues ongoing since 2007.... I giddily look towards 2014 with great anticipation.

This is the year I secure my long term employment by striking out on my own, where previous employers cannot make life impossible by the dubious demands placed on me, where they can't abuse their power, where I can't be not even considered for a job role because of subtle discrimination due to my past health because I won't be making myself feel ineffectual and redundant - Because I know I still have plenty to offer!

This is the year I get the all clear from the breast cancer

This is the year my house finally sells and I get to be able to move on with my life

This is the year I finally complete the challenge I set myself while recovering from the Chemotherapy and Pneumonia back in 2010 - Mount Kilimanjaro....I AM coming to get you!

This is the year I do the London Moonwalk again with a much improved time over the 10 hours it took me last time...and with not being ill on the night! ( after securing my place )

And this is the year I will have my first holiday since Iceland in Jan 2010.

2014 IS GOING TO BE MY YEAR!

Climbing Ben Nevis was most definitely a major achievement for this year - a massive positive to cancel out some big negatives - such as the Zumba letdown.

Keep living life to the fullest you possibly can, I know I try my hardest to do so.

Until next time

Tracy